Monday, December 10, 2012

"Just Say Yes" To: Masculinity, Femininity & Joy-gasms

Estimated reading time approximately 4 minutes plus viewing time....

I know....I said I wouldn't be writing right now.

Yet, when I decided to take time to balance myself this weekend and to allow some much needed masculinity into my life...well I've become inspired and feel the need to write.

I know....I know...the title is - well it is branching into a different direction that is probably on the brink of taboo...

Yet, when you realize that your entire life you have closed yourself off, spent all of your life exerting your energy to say "no", to restrain yourself and your love that you have to give...
           ....and then you wake up one day and realize that the very thing you have been holding back, holding in because it has not felt safe to share or that the World would not appreciate it or know what to do with it....
          ....and that the very thing you have been holding in, holding back is the VERY thing the Earth, the Divine, that God Himself needs from the women of the earth right now more than ever...
         ....and when you realize that the very essence of what women have and what has been denied to them, from them and by them...

....well you want to do what you can to rectify the situation.  And you want to share what has impacted you so greatly...on such a deep level that you cannot simply hold it into yourself...but have to spread the word...

And this is where I found myself today.  In utter awe at the fact that what I have wanted and held within me all my life, the very thing I've wondered how I would ever contain... well, that the answer was inside me all along.

So what is it?  What is this answer I have found?

First and foremost, the answer to know what it means to being a female in a female body.

Along those same lines, the answer to what it means to be a female in relation to the male.  What am I to the masculine.  What can I do for him.  What his masculinity is to me  And why I  can survive just fine without a male in my life, but all the while still crave the balance of masculinity not just from within my own soul, but from actual men in my life.

If you've been reading for some time, you know that this has been at the heart of my search for why power and abuse reside in our culture...and at growing, alarming rates.  As I have proceeded to understand this basic question, it has led me on quite a journey.  (Stay posted for my book to read more about this...about how I've moved from a Complementarism view of Christianity to a Progressive view.)

Well, in another wild and crazy turn of that journey...I found the below series by David Deida.  I can only pray that you will give this man and what he has to say ~ about masculinity, femininity, God, love and sex ~ a chance.  I was a little apprehensive the first time I heard of him and his work...for my religious background had taught me to shame my body ~ especially my connection of my sexuality to my body and to my femininity.

However, in just a few minutes of time - David brought light and clarity to so many questions.  And in doing so, I again feel an even deeper connection to the Divine...and to what I believe Jesus was trying to say if you remove all the centuries of dogma and doctrine we have built up around Him.  I now feel like I am finally getting the idea of what it means to be a woman...and how to best use that to balance out and encourage the masculine in around me.

My "Just Say Yes"* Proclamation 
Besides this being the title to a new Snow Patrol song...this is also the saying that I am learning to open myself up to.  So with this, I am moving forward from this spot, proclaiming "YES!" to

~ Being a woman, full of the feminine essence, full of creative life and vitality and passion and nourishment of course...
~ Discovering out that the source of the above is through my womb, my kundalini, my second heart...and that no one else has the right to control or manipulate or use this very essence of my femininity for their own selfish gain...and that it is my duty to guard Her and honor Her fully...
~ Owning my sexuality and sensuality in a way that produces healing ~ and through that healing, life for those around me who are wearied and tired and burdened with the heaviness that this world bestows on each of us...
~ Gladly accepting and allowing what the masculine essence of the world wants and has to offer...when offered from the heart...
~ Taking the unbelievable power of felt love that is symbolized (see, everything can be seen as symbolic!) in the physical act of making love, the power and delight of orgasm...which doesn't even have to be the climax - but simply the purest feeling of love - taking that righteous love out into my world and offering it as a gift of worship to the Divine to those who come across my path.

And that, my friend,  is what I call "Joy-gasm"...a saying by no means I have termed myself...but appropriately fits my idea of what it means to Practice Joy....

So, what can you work at saying yes to in your life?  
What can you open yourself up to instead of closing yourself off from?  
What will you "just say yes" to next?

*Note: Click here to read the words of a wonderful teacher of the just say yes model and her take on this saying.


  1. This is real interesting. Thank you for that

    1. You are so welcome. Thank you for reading and hope you join me back here to share your thoughts more often Joy! (love your name!)


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